Wednesday, March 29, 2006

The Royal Child revisited and The palace gardenr speaks

Another go at the poem " The Royal Child

The Royal Child

Her name was whispered in the halls, as slowly she walked by
And so she wondered what it was, that caused the sound so shy.
What had she done, just who was she that they made such a fuss?
She was a pleasant child she thought and not a gloomy guss.

Was it the time that Robert came and pulled her by the hair?
She didn’t holler, no not she, but calmly she did bear
Then she took him by the arm, threw him soundly on the ground
And gave him a good pound.

Or maybe it’s the time she took,a llizard from the rocky wall.
And placed it on her tutor’s chair which caused the teacher then to bawl.
The teacher cried and cried and ran
Then no one came to tutor Ann.

At any rate she walked the hall, the royal hall at home.
And when she walked she didn’t care,
what they thought when they did stare
Cause she was left alone.

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Let me tell you I don't know what the queen was thinking when she bought this place. "Looks pretty in the trees." Indeed. Does she have to rake the endless leaves that fall from the "pretty trees"? I think not. Do you know HOW many bags of leaves I took to the woods in back of the palace. I lost count at about 20.

And, you know what? I can't even get a proper garden started for the blasted roots from the "pretty trees". Just goes to show you, queens should not be allowed to buy palaces based on looks alone. But then, they never consult me, I'm just the palace gardener.

1 comment:

marlyat2 said...

I'd stick to the alternating iambic tetrameter and iambic trimeter lines in quatrains. That will work best to make an amusing ballad. But you can't vary line length with this kind of poem!

Before she took him rather than Then?
Soundly down?

Think about whether you want to amplify by repetition (hall, the royal hall).

It's tighter. It's less archaic and has more natural word order. That's going in the right direction.

I often fiddle with poems for years...